I think maybe I stumbled into a surprising way of doing something good? It’s small now, but it might be bigger with your help. No, don’t worry, this doesn’t end with a GoFundMe… but it is about money, and how we choose to spend it. Even when we think we’re saving it.

Here’s the bottom line: if you know about socially responsible investing, I know a boutique wealth management firm that suddenly wants to learn. Because I overcame my fear and I asked them to. And, bless their hearts, they listened. Please, for those of you who know how to reach me, go ahead and hit me up with links to resources, other firms they could learn from, whatever you got? Promise I’ll pass it along.

And now, if you’ve got a minute, here’s the longer story. It’s always a longer story with me, isn’t it? 🤣

My ex was the one in charge of our money. By the time I left in 2021, I had been thoroughly trained for thirty years to believe that Managing Money Is Scary. I *needed* him to manage our household expenses, to plan our investments and our future. Didn’t I?

As scary as it was for me to suddenly have to figure out our financial position so I could claim my fair share of it, it was even more terrifying to contemplate making my own financial decisions going forward. Fortunately, good karma came to my rescue.

Back when my dad passed away – fourteen years ago this week ❤️ – and my mom faced her future alone, I had a deeply trusted California-based friend who’s a Certified Financial Planner. That’s a fiduciary designation, meaning they’re obligated to provide advice in *your* interest as their client, even when it conflicts with their own financial incentives. My wonderful friend referred us to a whole firm of CFPs, here in Massachusetts, right down the road from my mom. They’ve helped the fam in various ways ever since. So, in my moment of need, I suddenly had certifiably trustworthy help to turn to. Which I still needed. Didn’t I?

Indeed, they’ve been wonderful. I’m probably their tiniest client, but I don’t feel that way. They’ve been so kind, so thorough, so diplomatic in handling stuff like last year’s tax filing with my then-not-yet-ex-husband while I kept my no-contact with him. They focus on holistic wealth – not just your bank balance, but how it aligns with your life goals and values.

So, when I finally freed my share of our retirement savings after the divorce went through a couple months ago, they were right there to walk me through investing it in ways that work *for me.* My goals. My values.

Well. The goals side was pretty simple; I want to have a secure but not extravagant retirement, and I’m fairly risk-averse, so let’s not set aggressive growth targets.

The values side… got interesting.

“Y’all know I’m a nonprofit person, and we’ve talked about the fact that I care really deeply about social and racial justice. I don’t know a lot about socially responsible investing, but I know it’s a thing, and I think I’d like to invest that way. Whatdyoucallit, with ESG filters. For environmental, social, and governance stuff. What do you do for your clients who want that sort of social impact with their money?”

I’m on a zoom with two of the lovely folks who’ve been holding my hand (virtually) through this. So I can see that they look surprised. And then I can see onscreen that *I* look surprised, at their surprise.

“We don’t typically advise that, because you give up potential investment income that way.”

Oh. I don’t like the sound of giving up income. And I don’t really know what I’m talking about. Do I?

Wait. I do. I actually do. I spent nearly a decade working at SoCal Grantmakers, occasionally sitting in on our sessions for foundation decisionmakers about how to stop investing their millions/billions of dollars in harmful ways that undermine what they’re ostensibly trying to achieve with the relatively small percentage of their money that they give out as grants. I learned about this.

“Hm,” I say. “I’m surprised that you don’t have clients who’ve asked for this before, since it seems so perfect for your emphasis on holistic wealth! And I think I’ve heard that you don’t actually have to give up profit by investing responsibly – that’s kind of a myth, isn’t it? Maybe I can have it both ways?”

There’s a pause on the zoom. “Hm,” they say in return. “We don’t think so. We’re very careful as stewards of your investments to make sure we’re giving you as much future flexibility as possible, by getting you the best return for your risk profile and timeline. When it comes to charitable aspects, our clients focus more on aligning their donations and maybe their volunteering with their values. And maybe what they choose to drive.”

“My risk profile…” I say, thinking out loud. “That depends how you define risk, doesn’t it? I mean, I do want a secure retirement. If I need care, I wanna live in one of those fancy nice-smelling assisted-living places that’s like a glorified college dorm for octogenarians minus the term papers and final exams. But I don’t want it to be all white people living there because nobody of color can afford to. And I don’t want to have to put on a breathing mask to go outside because we’ve destroyed the environment. What good will it do me if I have enough money to end my days living comfortably in a world where only rich people who look like me me can do that, and I helped make it even worse for everyone else? That’s the biggest risk. I’d gladly spend money *not* to live in that world. And giving up investment profit is basically another way of spending my money, isn’t it?”

Pause. “Okay, we can look into it and show you how much you might be giving up so you can compare for yourself. And then if you decide you really want to get lower returns going forward, we can check with the Investment Committee that has to approve our recommendations and see if they’re willing to sign off on a choice like that.”

I gulp. Am I really going to insist? Make them do the work of researching this? Put myself on the spot where I have to actually decide whether to stick with my principles or get richer by investing in, I dunno, fossil fuels and tobacco?

Yes I am. “Thanks, that would be great,” I say. “I would really hate to just drop my values when they might actually cost me something.”

Flash forward a couple of weeks, and we’re on a zoom again. They’re screensharing a bewildering array of graphs, pie charts, data tables. And they look surprised again.

“We’re new to this, but we did find a few socially responsible investing options that look quite good. Past performance is no guarantee of future results, you know. But we’ve screened these funds in a variety of ways, and it seems likely that the Investment Committee would approve this portfolio recommendation. It looks solid. And… now that we know this much, we’d like to learn more. We want to start offering socially responsible options to more of our clients. It’s great that you pushed us on this. Thank you.”

I mean. Wow. Did not see that coming. Or did I? Maybe I did. After all this self-doubt. Maybe I actually did know something.

However. I certainly don’t mean to sound like I’m suddenly claiming expertise here. So I can’t tell you for sure how good a job they did on this. I’m guessing it’s pretty rudimentary. I’ve got fragments of memories somewhere in the back of my mind from those SCG sessions on impact investing, whispering to me that there’s so much more to learn.

Which brings us back to you, and any recommendations for resources that you could help me share with these good folks. That could include other advisors to talk with – for them, I mean. Because I’m not planning to change advisors. Not now that my advisors themselves seem willing to change.

It’s so scary sometimes. But I have to keep remembering: I like being part of change.

Onwards, friends.